29 Funny Albert Einstein Quotes
1. "Bureaucracy is the death of all sound work." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
2. "You can’t blame gravity for falling in love." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
3. "I’m doing just fine, considering that i have triumphantly survived nazism and two wives." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
4. "I have reached an age when, if someone tells me to wear socks, i don’t have to." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
5. "Women always worry about things that men forget; men always worry about things women remember." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
6. "A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am i or are the others crazy?" (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
7. "Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one’s living at it." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
8. "If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?" (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
9. "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and i’m not sure about the the universe." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
10. "The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
11. "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
12. "The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
13. "Black holes are where god divided by zero." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
14. "Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
15. "Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
16. "Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
17. "Too many of us look upon americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the americans themselves." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
18. "The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
19. "If a equals success, then the formula is a equals x plus y and z, with x being work, y play, and z keeping your mouth shut." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
20. "We all know that light travels faster than sound. That’s why certain people appear bright until you hear them speak." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
21. "Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
22. "Those who thoughtlessly make use of the miracles of science and technology, without understanding more about them than a cow eating plants understands about botany, should be ashamed of themselves." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
23. "No one here at the technikum is up to date in modern physics ? I have already tapped all of them without success. Would i too become so lazy intellectually if i were ever doing well?" (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
24. "There is a race between mankind and the universe. Mankind is trying to build bigger, better, faster, and more foolproof machines. The universe is trying to build bigger, better, and faster fools. So far the universe is winning." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
25. "After receiving a distinction from chicago decalogue society: how unfortunate a state must a community find itself if it cannot produce a more suitable candidate upon whom to confer such a distinction?" (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
26. "As for the words of warm praise addressed to me, i shall carefully refrain from disputing them. For who still believes that there is such a thing as genuine modesty? I should run the risk of being taken for just an old hypocrite." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
27. "The wireless telegraph is not difficult to understand. The ordinary telegraph is like a very long cat. You pull the tail in new york, and it meows in los angeles. The wireless is the same, only without the cat." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
28. "What a strange thing must be a girl’s soul! Do you really believe that you could find permanent happiness through others, even if this be the one and only beloved man? I know this sort of animal personally, from my own experience as i am one of them myself. Not too much should be expected from them, this i know quite exactly. Today we are sullen, tomorrow high-spirited, after tomorrow cold, then again irritated and half-sick of life. And so it goes." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
29. "One had to cram all this stuff into one’s mind for the examinations, whether one liked it or not. This coercion had such a deterring effect on me that, after i had passed the final examination, i found the consideration of any scientific problems distasteful to me for an entire year." (Albert Einstein) Click to tweet
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